Everything's a blur... Days are running into days. My meals are less and less ambitious. Why?? Because all my kids do is eat!! All I do is feed them, all my meals blur together really. It's really hard to be ambitious when eating is all your kids ever do and so long as it's what they are nutritionally needing, they are happy! It doesn't matter how much salt is has on it.
Nothing real exciting today. A couple days ago RJ started wigging out after eating a whole bunch of Coconut Oil. I love lots of oil on my brussel sprouts! I don't think his Candida like it very much! He just had no ability to rationalize, he was throwing a massive panic tantrum over the dumbest thing. Why I didn't think of a bath right then, I don't know.. Venita's Yeast is clinging on for dear life... I'm starting to think Bio-Kult is about in order for her. I'm thinking me too. Just so I can get a good amount of good bacteria in my body before baby comes. And of course, RJ would benefit significantly too. He has had one little rash on his privates since intro. With Venita it is a constant battle. I have also noticed her immune system has declined since we stopped nursing. In one month she has been sick twice and both times have lasted a long time. So I know the probiotics would benefit her a lot..
Yesterday we decided to go try out a new restaurant in Billings called "The Field House." It's kinda tradition when someone is flying in or out of town we usually do a meal as a family. It seems that our diet will complicate many traditions. But we received a tip from my cousin about a restaurant that is pretty clean feeding. No processed foods and they source as much local food as possible. I knew Venita would be easy. I could just bring her food, and I hoped that RJ and I could find something. I had read a bunch of reviews about some of their food and I was really hoping they had sourdough bread so I could have one of their burgers.. Sourdough is only suggested for pregnant or nursing woman with good enough digestive health. I would say my digestive health is quite good compared to most. So I lucked out and they had sourdough bread. The burger was delish! Of course yes everything was quite expensive. But no more than a high end restaurant. RJ had a salad and I ordered a chicken breast but it had a sauce with it. I tried to clean off the sauce because it looked like there was dairy in it. Turns out, cleaning it off wasn't enough. He ended up getting a stomach ache and diarrhea.. But I handled the burger really well, no stomach ache or anything. Though it felt incredibly heavy in my stomach like I had eaten a brick or something. But later than night I was dealing with pretty bad Heart Burn. But I ate a grapefruit and took some HCL and it went away right away and I slept like a baby. So overall, the restaurant wasn't something to completely rave about. The food was good, but didn't have much selection sadly. But I loved the atmosphere!
You know, this morning I woke up and for the first time in my entire life I had the thought, "Ugh another day." Like I just begin the day as I always do, looking at the clock.. Se how much I got to sleep in, or how early I have to get up, always random. And I go cook Venita and RJ breakfast. Luckily I'm not as sick in the mornings now, and I'm not ready to pass out the whole time I'm trying to cook. I'm just so ready to be done with intro... But really will that ever make life better!! lol Because I've always felt this way, just not so bad. Will I ever get it together, will I ever get all my laundry done, will I ever declutter like I want to? Will I ever feel weightless??? Some days I would pay someone to burn my house down. Just so I don't have to deal with all this stuff. I will get there, I just gotta start throwing crap away. But I have so many things out of sentimental value that stress me out just having.. Like plants... WHY!!! They mean so much to me especially if it's a plant thats been in the family for generations. What the heck, and if you kill it, it's like killing a memory and I hate that idea. And I don't have a green thumb at all... Ugh I just want this weight off of me. A constant reminder of my failure as a wife or mother. I know people say I'm hard on myself, but really you should see my pile of laundry.... Really.....
Tomorrow I'm throwing 100 things away, not joking.. 100 things are exiting my house..... Ugh...
Update: Me and RJ always seemed to have a reaction to food about the same time, and I never realized it. After some bouts of trial and error long enough you will start noticing a pattern. Well I did with eggs, but nothing else.. It turns out we are quite sulfur and histamine sensitive. Hense the reason he kept reacting to the brussel sprouts! Venita was also getting face and butt rashes from the sauerkraut, so it makes a lot of sense now! We are going on intro again to do low sulfur and histamine which are very similar, and see the difference as well as continue to heal!
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